sharing the love

“I will praise the Lord no matter what happens. I will consistently speak of all His glories and grace. I will boast of all His kindness to me. Let all who are discouraged take heart. Let us praise The Lord together, and exalt His name. For I cried to Him and He answered me! He freed me from all my fears.” Psalm 34:1-4 The Living Bible

This verse was part of the reading for my morning devotion today, and wow did it hit home. After my experience the last few days, it was the perfect verse and a reminder that it’s important to share these stories.

I’ve been feeling stressed and unfortunately my reaction to stress is to overeat. I know it’s not healthy, I know it’s not wise, I know in a way it denies my claim of faith – that I can rely on God to help me through anything and everything. But I felt powerless to stop. And finally two days ago as I was driving to work I reached my limit. I cried out to God, literally. People passing me may have thought I was crazy. I spent a good ten minutes talking out loud to God. I asked Him to help me understand why I couldn’t seem to rely on Him, instead turning to food for comfort. I reminded God, and myself, that I had asked Him to fill the God-shaped hole inside me. And that when He answered my prayer my life had changed drastically. I asked God to help me remember how much He loved me and wanted only the best for me. I offered Him my worries and my fears and by His grace I was able to leave them there. That day, the urge to eat just for the sake of eating was less and I felt encouraged.

Then yesterday as I was driving to work I realized I had left my phone at home. My first instinct was to proceed on to work as I don’t really need it, but then I thought about my mom. When she needs me, she always calls my cellphone. I decided to go back home to get my phone. I couldn’t leave her without a way to reach me, even if it meant I would be late for work. As I turned toward home, I felt the stress settle back around me. And that is when God helped me recognize the heart of my issue. I am my mother’s main support now. I’m glad to be able to help and do what I can for her, but I can’t do everything she needs, or even everything I might wish I could. And in that moment I realized that was my problem. I feel guilty for not doing more. My stress comes from feeling like I am failing my mother. But I give what I can, and I vowed in that moment to remember that God is there with me – and with my mother – and I do not need to do it all. I felt the stress begin to lift and as I rounded a curve in the road, God gave me the exclamation point to His reminder. The truck coming toward me had a sign below it’s license plate with one simple word – Jesus.

The rest of the day, my appetite was back to normal. I was comforted that my focus was back where it belonged and my stress was under control. God had heard my plea and answered me. He understood my fear and loved me even when I doubted His presence.

So now, you can see why the Psalm I read this morning prompted this post. I had to speak of God’s love and mercy and share how He is always near and ready to hear when we call..

Advertisements

One thought on “sharing the love

  1. Kristy VanKleef says:

    Dear Coni, Wow as I read this one, I was so touched tears began to roll down my cheeks. I’ve experienced briefly what it’s like to be someone’s main support, and it really can weigh on you if you let it. But I actually have more experience at this point in being an onlooker as well as the one needing support, including from you. One thing that really has helped me and others as I have learned to lean on my faith and his promises more and more is that you do not have to try so hard…simple presence, love, prayers, hugs who you are right now this very second is more than enough. You do not have to do or be anything more than you already are. God equips you with the just the right strength to carry on and he never lets us down. Even when things are not quite how we’d imagine them to be he works everything together for the good, even if we cannot feel or see it right now, he will never forsake us Phew what a relief, we cannot do anything to make him love us any more or less, he will always be with us, he knows how we are feeling, he knows just what we need before we do, our ever tear and prayer is heard and understood. He has a plan for all of us greater than we can ever imagine. Some powerful stuff. I don’t know about you but that gives me the ability to surrender my worries of this life into his hands just a little more with each breath knowing how tender and gentle he is, how acutely he understands, and how powerful his promises are. With overeating, that is your humanness, we all have strengths and weaknesses but the best part is you have the power within to change with his help. But more importantly forgive yourself just as God forgives you. Treat yourself with the love and compassion you so freely give to others realizing that yes this is a difficult time, I am scared, and worn. Turn to his love and promises for comfort reach out for the warmth surrounding you, surround yourself with life-giving nourishing things; but allow yourself the freedom to indulge too. Sweet trusting balance. Thank you so much for sharing with such authenticity!! xox Warm love, hugs, and prayers!! xox Kristy

    Date: Sat, 16 Jan 2016 17:18:40 +0000 To: kristyhorse8@hotmail.com

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s